Well-meaning straight friends
I have been single for a while now. Personally, it doesn’t really bother me all that much to not be in a relationship. My friends, on the other hand, always seem to think it’s a real problem that should be fixed. And when I say my friends, I am mainly referring to my straight friends. Because who would choose to be single when there’s all these potential partners out there who could make you happy.
Luckily, they usually accept the fact that I hate to be set up, but now and then, they just can’t help themselves. They come up with the most brilliant suggestions of what I could do to end my lonely existence.
I don’t know how often I have heard something a long the lines of “I know and friend of a friend who knows a girl”. Sometimes I am stupid enough to ask what they are like. The reaction is usually something like “She’s a lesbian, and she’s single”. Yep. That’s enough for me to live happily ever after with someone.
The most unbelievable thing one of my straight friends recently suggested, was for me to hire a prostitute. I am not kidding. Apparently, there’s some who do women too. Yep. How else am I going to get some.
Luckily, they usually accept the fact that I hate to be set up, but now and then, they just can’t help themselves. They come up with the most brilliant suggestions of what I could do to end my lonely existence.
I don’t know how often I have heard something a long the lines of “I know and friend of a friend who knows a girl”. Sometimes I am stupid enough to ask what they are like. The reaction is usually something like “She’s a lesbian, and she’s single”. Yep. That’s enough for me to live happily ever after with someone.
The most unbelievable thing one of my straight friends recently suggested, was for me to hire a prostitute. I am not kidding. Apparently, there’s some who do women too. Yep. How else am I going to get some.
Comments
And I was like: "No no no... I don't talk about your love life and you don't mess with mine. Are we clear?"
*roll of eyes*