Probably one of the worst songs ever recorded in the history of ever is No More Games by everyone’s favourite boy band New Kids on the Block. As I have shamefully admitted on previous occasions, I went through a bit of a boy band phase when I was little.
OK, so those of you who know how old I am know that I wasn’t that little when this song came out, but I was still a young and innocent teenager. Fourteen to be exact, but I could be off by a year.
Anyways, I loved this crappy song and I honestly thought it was awesome, especially the rap at the end. I was totally clueless about the fact that Donnie Wahlberg couldn’t rap for shit and that the lyrics were the most retarded ever.
I mean, the song starts with Donnie saying, “No more games is about positivity, and positivity is not about being soft, it’s about being smart. You suckers.” WTF. I was going to say in their defence and mine, that we were young and did not know any better.
At least, I know better now. But those NKOTB boys? Someone should have told them that what is cute when you are in your early twenties looks kind of dumb when you are grown men in your late thirties. Oh well, it’s probably just about money anyway.
I was actually present at this exact concert. No, not embarrassing at all.
Back to the No More Games song. I loved the rap at the end so much, that not only did I learn it by heart, but I also used to rap it myself, every chance I got. I am not joking. I was totally unashamed and unaware that I: 1. Couldn’t rap. 2. Was making an ass of myself, and 3. That apart from fellow NKOTB fans, no one liked or cared for my rap.
I would rap NKOTB songs at school on the playground, in the toilets, in the halls, even in the classrooms sometimes. What the hell was wrong with me?
You know what the worst part is? To this day, I still know the rap by heart. In fact, I know a lot of bad raps by heart. Besides all NKOTB raps, I also remember, for example, all the lyrics to Ice Ice Baby.
Shut up! I am sure you did some pretty embarrassing things as a teenager too.