Tuesday, May 20, 2008

Don’t you want to know what it’s like with a man?

I had this conversation with one of my straight friends the other day. We were talking about relationships and sex, and she seemed very surprised to find out I was a gold star lesbian.

‘You mean to say, you have never had sex with a man, not even once?’ she asked me, as if it was the weirdest thing she had ever heard. ‘Well,’ I said, ‘you have never had sex with a woman.’ But apparently, that isn’t the same thing.

Is it really not the same thing? I mean, we do tend to find out our orientation a little later than straight people do, so there are probably more lesbians who have slept with men than straight girls who have slept with women (the geek in me would love to see some research data on this).

However, I would think that besides that, it is exactly the same whether you are gay or straight. Besides one important difference. Most straight girls seem very curious about what it is like to have sex with a woman.

I have yet to find a lesbian who thinks the same way about having sex with men.

1 comment:

~wicked~ said...

it's not here nor there on whether it's the same thing...it is different in any angle you place it....but, hun, you ain't missing nothing in not ever having had sex with a man.....i, unfortunately, came out late in my life and when straight people ask me or imply that i preferred men, i have no problem in correcting them: simply, i believe that i was very bisexual from an early age but knew that women were a preference from the age of 6 (having drooled over my dad's Playboy centrefolds and Vargas art pics when they left me to be a very young latch-key kid). yes, i dated boys/men, i loved boys/men, i fuqd boys/men and even married one (for 20yrs) and had two amazing kids with him...but ALL the men with the exception of one dude i dated and, of course, my son, were total loser assholes who never knew how to treat a woman properly. when i lived the bdsm lifestyle for a few years, i had a fairly great Master (who later turned out to be just as fuqing messed up as the rest of the men) who was very good with me in the beginning....and it gave me opportunity to experience and 'taste' the joys of women...i never looked back after that...the preference had become apparent...nothing, absolutely nothing, is as great as sex with a woman. after that, and to this day, the idea of intimacy with a man is so repulsive to me, i become physically (and mentally/emotionally) ill. lately, i'm having flashbacks of sexual scenes from my past with men and it's really really hard on me...to the point i am in therapy for it.